7 Simple Ways to Meaningfully Connect with a Person Living with Dementia

The NCCDP teaches person-centered care as part of its evidence-based Alzheimer's Disease and Dementia Care Curriculum.
7 Simple Ways to Meaningfully Connect with a Person Living with Dementia

Utilizing Person-Centered Skills, Communication and Connection can Avoid Common Frustrations and Challenges

Use Clear and Simple Language

  • Speak slowly and clearly: “Would you like tea or coffee?” instead of “What would you like to drink today?”
  • Use short, simple sentences: “Let’s go for a walk” instead of “Would you like to go outside for some fresh air and exercise?”
  • Avoid complex questions: Instead of asking, “What would you like to do today?” say, “Would you like to listen to music or look at photos?”
  • Give extra time: After asking a question, wait patiently, maintaining eye contact while giving them time to process and respond.

Show Empathy and Patience

  • Acknowledge their feelings: “I can see you’re upset. It’s okay to feel that way.”
  • Validate emotions: If they express confusion or fear, respond with, “That sounds difficult. I’m here to help you.”
  • Avoid correcting or arguing: If they misremember something, instead of correcting them, say, “That’s a nice memory. Tell me more about it.”
  • Stay calm and composed: If they repeat a question multiple times, respond as if it’s the first time, with kindness and patience.

Use Nonverbal Communication

  • Maintain eye contact: When speaking, maintain gentle eye contact to show you’re engaged.
  • Use gentle touch: Hold their hand or offer a reassuring pat on the shoulder, if they’re comfortable with touch.
  • Smile warmly: A smile can convey warmth and reassurance even when words fail.
  • Use facial expressions: Express emotions through your facial expressions to help convey meaning.
  • Open, relaxed body language: Sit or stand at their level and avoid crossing your arms, which can appear closed-off or intimidating.

Focus on Their Strengths and Interests

  • Engage in familiar activities: If they enjoyed gardening, offer to plant flowers together or water plants.
  • Use music to connect: Play songs from their youth and sing along together.
  • Encourage participation: If they enjoy cooking, invite them to help with simple tasks like stirring ingredients or setting the table.
  • Reminisce about past experiences: Look at old photos or talk about their favorite places and memories.
  • Celebrate small successes: Praise their efforts, even if the task isn’t completed perfectly.

Maintain Consistency and Routine

  • Establish daily rituals: Start the day with a familiar routine, such as morning coffee and reading the newspaper.
  • Use visual cues: Label drawers and cupboards with pictures and words to help them find items independently.
  • Stick to familiar surroundings: Avoid rearranging furniture or changing the layout of their living space.
  • Create a daily schedule: Write down daily activities on a whiteboard or calendar for easy reference.
  • Use simple reminders: “It’s time for lunch now” or “Let’s get ready for bed.”

Enter Their Reality

  • Join their world: If they believe they need to go to work, instead of correcting them, say, “You’ve worked hard all your life. You deserve to rest today.”
  • Respond with compassion: If they ask about a loved one who has passed away, consider saying, “They’re not here right now, but I know they love you very much.”
  • Use distraction gently: If they become fixated on a distressing thought, redirect their attention with a soothing activity like listening to music or looking at a favorite book.
  • Validate their perspective: Even if their reality doesn’t match yours, respond with empathy, saying, “That must be difficult. I’m here for you.”

Foster Connection Through Shared Moments

  • Share sensory experiences: Offer a soft blanket, scented lotion, or a favorite snack to evoke positive memories.
  • Enjoy nature together: Sit outside in the sun, listen to birds, or watch the leaves rustle in the breeze.
  • Use music as a bridge: Sing familiar songs, hum melodies, or clap along to the rhythm.
  • Look through photo albums: Help them recall cherished moments by showing pictures of loved ones and familiar places.
  • Simply be present: Hold their hand, sit beside them, or share a smile—sometimes, silent companionship is the most meaningful connection.

Learn More & Get Certified in Dementia Care

The National Council of Certified Dementia Practitioners (NCCDP) teaches person-centered care as part of its evidence-based Alzheimer’s Disease and Dementia Care Curriculum.  NCCDP’s ADDC seminar is the foundation to receive certification as a Certified Dementia Practitioner (CDP) or Certified Alzheimer’s Disease and Dementia Care Trainer (CADDCT).  These certifications are the gold standard in dementia care, signifying a caregiver has the tools and expertise to provide excellent care.

About the Author

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NCCDP Staff

The NCCDP staff consists of a full team of experts in dementia care & education.

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